Friday, April 13, 2012

What is relation?

I feel I am  a fairly open ...and very honest person. I feel I connect well with others. I gravitate to the interesting characters in life. I am probably not the most traveled person, but I get around.  I feel I am compassionate towards others and do what I can to help anyone that is in my life that may need help. I cant prove that God exists yet I cannot disprove it either. I am comfortable with saying....I don't know. I hope there is! But I also hope for a lot of things that aren't readily available. People are fallible, and I am content with saying I am flawed. I don't exactly know what the cause of my flaw is or more importantly WHAT my flaw is. I DO know that there is this feeling that is deep beneath the surface that stabs at me from time to time that assures me to the fact that Vince is flawed. I love life, Life is so very beautiful and any cliche that you can drop into this text that applies...its all that!! I realize that! I own that! I love that! ........................................................I feel alone.

I rarely call my family....well, I virtually NEVER call my family. And by family I mean the one I was born into. Not the one I created. I feel I was too responsible to do such a thing. I felt that one cannot bring a child into this world without knowing oneself fully. I feel one cannot commit them self to someone without being completely at one with their own consciousnesses....   Its an exercise in futility. But I have tried! I am comfortable with opening myself to a stranger yet I cannot call my grandmother and tell her how deeply I feel for her. I cannot feel comfortable with telling my sister that I love her. I cant talk to my mother and show any amount of the compassion, the same compassion I am so proud to say I can give. I am my father's only son and I am not much closer to him than I am a casual friend.

Is relation relative? and why do I not relate to my relatives?

No comments:

Post a Comment